April 22, 2015, Wednesday
That day, the cross line of death was just right in front of me, my whole brain was blank and don't know how to respond to. I was coming out from small road and the other truck was turning inside with a very high speed, by seeing the truck was almost hit on my driver side door and I've nothing to do to stop it... But luckily the truck managed to step on the break pedal on the last few second......
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After all something great happened, I lost the feeling of jealously out of sudden. As I was a very competitive person and very easy to got jealous on others. Despite on what I've, I know I'm much way better than others, but still I'm still jealous on how they're so fortune to have a boyfriend/husband to buy stuffs for them according to what they like, they can go travel without paying any single dollar as their other behalf with pay for them. Which is why I also claimed that why do I don't have the other person that can get to know what am I thinking and what I want as they do...(Well, honestly but I do feel proud that I done everything by myself and pay myself, not hopping for anyone to pay for me)
Bla, bla, bla......all of these were the "stuffs" that was in my mind, but the good thing is after this incident, the whole thing was gone like forever......I just lost all the feelings of jealousy towards them, guess it's because when it's near to death then I realized I shouldn't waste time on these. So yah, I'm really thanks to this incident actually and I'm happier than last time, isn't it amazing??
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那天。。。来不及发生的意外，面临死亡当前，突然间我脑袋空白，但却让我心中所有的妒嫉心完全消失，这是件非常奇妙的事，我从小就是一个比较心很重的人，所以妒嫉心很强，恨不得别人好的那种死心眼的女人。
每次放大别人的美好和放大自己的不美好，问谁都知道我。。。除了。。。没。。。有。。。男。。。朋。。。友之外！ 确实我其他方便几乎都比一般人来得好很多，我的工作跟家庭环境（应该是别人会嫉妒我，多过我会嫉妒人家吧！ 结果我自己还每次死心眼，那种烂心态）
那天放工回家去打油，我小路转出大路，一辆罗厘飞快地转进来，可以看到他的车头就要撞上我的司机车门了，我脑袋空空的，不知道我可以做出什么动作来避免。。。幸运的是罗厘司机即时踩上煞车技，才没让这场意外发生。。。我事后还一直想“假如你要撞，就一次过撞死好了，千万千万不要毁容还是断手断脚啊。。。
不过我事后却是真的很开心我可以摆脱这个妒嫉眼，没想到我就这样开窍了。因为在我脑袋一片空白的一刻，我想到我的人生好像没有什么，好像每天都为嫉妒的人而活的那样。尽管我事后一直拼命的想回去，我真的除了这些无谓的，我什么都想不起来。。。或许是这样，才让我这个闷搔的嫉妒心打开
或许很多人会说不要看别人的好，只看自己的，何必去嫉妒他人。 但当一个人处于那种专牛角尖的时刻是，无论旁人说什么，耳朵就好像建了一道不锈钢的抗音器，什么都听不进去的，况且假如一两句话就可以改变的话，这个世界就不会有看不开的人啦！
其实嫉妒到头来得到的只不过是你自己心里的不平衡罢了，什么也不会得到，也不会带来任何的改变。。。就自己自个儿在自己生闷气，生气又会有皱纹，又会变老，几乎半点优点都数不出来。而且你自己因为生气而周围去生闷气找人唠叨，别人不会同情你还是跟你一样生气，而是觉得你这个死三八，这么的小心眼。好的朋友就好跟你说实话，不好那些只会在后面偷笑罢了，简直就是自掏耻辱啊！
我现在放下那种嫉妒的死心眼，真的会快乐多了。不会每天在想那个谁谁怎样幸福，恨不得她好那样。。。这让我想到吸引力法则里，因为我自己怨恨很多，所以我头顶的乌云才会阴魂不善的跟着我。最后套句女王说“不要強求、不要比較、不要嫉妒，我們要做的是欣賞、學習、努力，祝福別人的成功以及學會真心的讚美。”
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Oh dear!!! So so scary!!! Thank goodness it did not happen. Do take care on the road, drive safe.
ReplyDeleteYup, it was scary like hell...must be alert all the time...
DeleteOh dear, when and where it happened? Most important you are alright.. It's good that those jealousy feelings all gone, not everyone is as fortunate as you mentioned la.. I pay for my own stuff and we are not rich people, still driving old car..
ReplyDeleteYah, just be grateful of what we have, that's enough...
DeleteOMG that was scary!!! luckily you are alright, cold sweat dripping and face turned pale.. and I must agree with you, after you have experienced something tragic, you will most probably changed.. you may change to look at things differently and appreciate what you have.. it's good that you are slowly feeling happy with what you are, and I think we can also feel it from your blog leh, it's a good thing.. I think this has also gotta do with the age, at different age and stages of life, we look into different things.. :)
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA.....Is damn true that I was so emo last time, until the moment I can't believe that, and I'm still learning. Hope that's one day I would be able came out a post teach people how to getting over jealousy and something...
DeleteThis is kind of like shock therapy at its most extreme. Thank goodness that's all that happened and something good come out of this close encounter!
ReplyDelete大难不死，必有后福！ ＝］
Delete這或許就是所謂的因禍得福吧，呵呵。
ReplyDelete嗯，相對男人，女人的妒嫉心確實會比較重。
但，其實反省的心態也很重要。
一個人，若極端並不自知的沉溺在妒忌人的心態中，那才恐怖。
而你，能看到自己的“缺點”，還能如此赤裸裸的分享，並反省...；
我只能說，我非常欣賞如此坦誠的你！
是，人家常說，大難不死，必有後福！
人生的際遇，確實會改變我們對生命的領悟和看法！
朋友，一起加油啊！！
因为我不容许自己退步，所以一直看自己有什么需要改进的，假如不去面对它就会不会有进步的一天，所以我必须一致无时无刻的提醒自己哦。
Delete很多事情都有两面，你看到的只是事情好的一面，比如买东西，有人付钱等，其实这些东西的背后，需要更多的迁就与包容，只能说，凡是有得必有失!!
ReplyDelete人就是很奇怪的爱看好的那方面，而永远看不到后面的悲哀。。。
Delete人比人气死人，你找到属于自己的价值，就不会对别人羡慕嫉妒恨了。
ReplyDelete因为我们都是世上唯一的。
DeleteThank God you are safe! Be happy that you are still alive and blogging otherwise we would miss you and cry buckets of tears.
ReplyDeleteI am surprised that You were always so jealous over small things. You sounded cute like a small gal.
Hey life is not always fair to everyone as one's karma rules. The fate is in our own hands and only we ourselves could change our fate. Just be happy that you have a lovely & caring family with a nice home besides having so many friends here. I am thankful that I am not drifting aimlessly like those poor boat people now. So sad for them. Cheer up & Happy Blogging Again.
Hahaha, sure or not?? Got people will miss me?? =p
DeleteYah, I always can jealous with very small thing, small like people won't even bother it, but I just take it too serious...
说真心话, 不比较不妒忌真的不容易, 我也在学着权衡啊~~~
ReplyDelete大家一起努力吧！＝］
Delete幸亏虚惊一场，人没事就好。。。
ReplyDelete那也是，人没事最重要。
Delete任何事摆在生死前面，一切都是渺小的。我很欣赏你勇于面对和承认自己的缺点，当你愿意正视问题就有摆脱的一天。
ReplyDelete我以前很喜欢逃避，但是一直逃避，它是永远不会进步的，所以我唯有告诉自己一定要很坦然的面对与改变。
DeleteGlad you are ok... yeah, all these jealously, anger, pettiness and so on are nothing when you faced the bigger things in life.
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right!
DeleteLuckily u don get any injuries, v don know what will happen next to us. It is normal to have jealousy and negative thinking in our life. Just sometimes when v over focus on it, it become a harm to us or others.
ReplyDeletewell no need to jealous on those who depends on their bf or partner so much. Be proud of urself for being so independent in ur decision making and responsible to ur life. It is a good thing that we learn how to grow up first be4 others, and u did it.
Be glad and be contented in life. It will make things better. Always have a two ways view.
Hope you are doing well ya
Being independent can be view as difficult but also is an enjoying...
DeleteI am glad to hear that nothing happened and the truck driver stopped in time. Good to know also that your view has changed for the better since this incident.
ReplyDeleteYup, I'm pretty happy to share my good and bad, wish people can learn something from it as well.
Delete